It Takes a Village - 6/2/2022

It’s Julia again. I had hoped by now John would be back at the keyboard, but he just isn’t ready yet.

It is probably pride that drives us to want to appear organized and self-sufficient. Asking for help isn’t exactly in the Churan nature or probably most people's..

The Churan Village

2714 E. Dry Wood Rd, Phoenix, AZ

When we took on the project last December of selling the house and buying a new one, we were taking on the tasks to get ahead of the need to get into a more manageable one-story home. The plan was to clear clutter and reduce “stuff” before the move happened. We had a couple of months to prepare which we felt would be fine.

The new house was going to be great for us, but it did need a good deal of updating. The current house was still having warranty work by our builder so we had to deal with coordinating that. Then there was the task of packing, finding homes for things we couldn’t take and setting up renovations.

When John went into the hospital in late March with rotavirus I had just started a new job and we were still taking bids for our renovation and move tasks. We had a little bit packed and were fooling ourselves that May 31 was plenty of time for the 2 of us to pull this off. One week in the hospital turned into 3 weeks and dialysis and PT were now a factor along with John now being extremely weak and less capable of helping very much and I was learning a new job.

We had many offers to help when we needed it but we fooled ourselve into thiking we had it under control. We even had 4 different friends/family offer to fly in from Ohio or Florida to help organize the project, but declined because it was going to be OK.

I considered backing off on renovations and just cleaning and moving in. John being our voice of reason said if we didn’t do at least the dirtiest jobs while the house was empty, we’d never do it so we made our selections, picks contractors that we had worked with previously and put together a calendar and put the plan in motion to begin as soon as the current owners moved out.

We began with a dear friend bringing over boxes and another insisting that she come to at least help bubble wrap our precious glass and crystal family heirlooms. The a great friend of John’s knew we had several items furniture items we needed to rehome and a lot of holes to repair in the walls from my over-abundance of artwork. He assembled a crew of people who didn’t even know us to come do the heavy lifting and repairs.

Once I acknowledged I couldn’t get this all done myself, we had so many amazing people step in to help.

• First, our amazing boys insisted on taking charge of the packing to allow me to be with John almost full-time in ICU
• They recruited a whole group of their friends that we have known since high school and college to come pack and do little odd jobs around the house
• Our awesome neighbors were very helpful in taking the trash in and out and keeping an eye out for packages so our local porch pirates didn’t go off with our booty
• Another neighbor was able to call in a favor and find a dialysis opening when the hospital was struggling with placement
• Our amazing painters and flooring guy went above and beyond to stay ahead of schedule and took on some items outside their scope so I didn’t have to worry about the new house project, Let me know if you need a referral, I will gladly send them your way.
• A super-supportive new boss who has been so understanding and flexible with me.
• Neighbors who text me to meet at the pool for a glass of wine just to unwind after really tough days
• One dear friend brought an order of Butta Cakes for the floor care team on John’s Re-Birthday
• A couple other girlfriends brought CRUMBL cookies for the ICU crew and took me to an early breakfast just to have a non-hospital meal
• We have had so many dear friends drop off surprises, send cards, online wishes and prayers - you have no idea how much the support means!
• Two former members of John’s oncology team have kept tabs and been amazing sounding boards throughout this process and resources to explain things when my TV medical degree wasn’t enough.
• A great friend of ours took a day and a Covid test to sit with John on move day so I could focus on movers
• The friends that call or text John regularly to complain about his favorite sports teams or just give him grief and a laugh to take his mind off the situation - even when he isn't up to answering, I make sure I read the messages to him.
• My cleaning ladies who worked their schedules to accommodate my schedule to prepare 2 houses
• Several former co-workers of John’s came to the rescue after move day to help deal with the odds and ends left from movers and make a huge dent in unpacking
• Jason’s girlfriend, Erin, and her family have been so supportive making meals and helping pack and unpack
• The plumber and HVAC companies that made emergency runs to the house when I explained my situation and had no A/C and a plumbing problem on move day

And this doesn’t even touch the kindness that everyone at the Mayo from the nurses, doctors and aids to the screeners at the door each day who compliment my decorative N95s or the cafeteria woman who recognizes me now and comments when I’m having a good hair day. (which isn’t very often these days)

I’m sure I’m forgetting some people and I’m so sorry for that. It isn’t intentional, I promise. Stress and sleep deprivation do funny things to a person. We're not sure how we can ever express our gratitude for all of the kindness and help we have gotten over the years, but particularly these last couple of months.  We are humbled and grateful!

John’s Village

I mentioned the great care he’s getting above from the Village of Angels at The Mayo, and it has been amazing.

I apologize for going silent for a few days. We got so involved with the move, and then excited for a few good days as he was making progress. When I last wrote, it was looking like he would soon be released to a rehab hospital and on the way to coming home to our new little Desert Peak house. They were doing everything necessary to prep him for this.

Then Monday came and he has taken steps backward all week. His fevers are back mainly in the evenings and at night. With fevers often comes confusion which is really hard because he often knows it but can’t do anything about it. He struggles to use his phone so if you’ve called and he hasn’t picked up, it either isn’t right by him, he wasn’t aware it was a call/text or he just wasn’t strong enough to answer.

Many of the markers they watch for after transplant have been improving to where they expect but he is still requiring transfusions and platelets almost daily and sometimes multiple times a day. This is still a big concern and isn’t what they expected. They have seen other problems post-transplant that aren’t generally associated with an auto stem cell transplant. We knew this was risky and we continue to pray they will find some answers to put him back on the road to recovery soon.

Thank you to everyone who has been part of his support village these 13 years!

Julia & John